Simple answers to seemingly-complicated problems

It is amazing how much time, energy and money is expended on disputes between spouses, partners, ex-spouses and ex-partners when children are involved.  Some of these examples lend themselves to easy resolution, but there is often a momentum to the court case that seems unstoppable.  Some examples of these common disputes:
  • Late pickups or dropoffs of the children for parenting time.
  • Failure to cooperate in allowing one parent to call children while in the company of other parent.
  • Last-minute cancellations or disruptions to parenting time.
  • Parenting-time schedules that are so variable or unclear that they lead to disputes and misunderstanding (or deliberate manipulation).
  • Use of the children to pass information, announcements, questions and comments between the parents.
  • One parent's obligation to contribute toward the children's medical and dental expenses incurred by the other parent.
  • Accusations about late or missing child-support payments.
I have seen more of these disputes than you can imagine, in my fifteen years practicing here in Chicago.  If you seem to be stuck in a never-ending cycle of conflict, with your children caught up in the drama and suffering more day-by-day, please give me call so we can sit down and talk about it.  I may be able to offer some completely-different approaches (not industry standard, by any means) to solving or resolving the disputes.  As I sometimes say, my hope is to lead you "Out of the darkness, into the sunlight."


- Kevin Johnson
  cell# 312-493-4241
  www.divorce.nu

 

Popular posts from this blog

Carefully Reviewing and Writing Divorce, Custody and Visitation Orders

I was recently reminded (again) how important the wording of a final 'judgment' or 'agreed order' can be.  When two parties are in the midst of negotiations, attempting to resolve a divorce or custody case, it can be tempting to finesse the final wording of an agreement to make the case end.  This is a time to be very careful!  Sometimes the wording of a parenting agreement or a financial settlement can be ambiguous - that is, each side thinks the paragraph, sentence or phrase means something different.  Before signing any agreement, it is good to read, and re-read it, carefully to think of how it might be understood differently in the future.
Read more

Divorce, custody, attorneys, and psychological warfare countermeasures

psychological warfare n. The use of various techniques, such as propaganda and terror, to lower an enemy's morale. The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by  Houghton Mifflin Company . All rights reserved. --------------------------------------------- In my work in divorce and custody cases, I often represent and counsel people who are the victims of 'psychological warfare' tactics.  These tactics are used by opposing parties to break their opponents will or resistance -- in other words, to "take the fight out of them."   Some tactics include ingratiating or co-opting relatives or friends, giving the other person false or misleading advice, getting the person to distrust his or her own attorney, causing severe financial distress and hardship, and otherwise making the person's life miserable and nearly unbearable.  These tactics often cause
Read more

Defend against psychological warfare - a Custody and Divorce Attorney's Perspective

Image
Do you feel that you're living a nightmare?  A custody or parenting-time battle is  a nightmare, and it's very difficult to break free of the mind-numbing, soul-draining struggle, to feel that you can breath some fresh air. There is hope, though.  I sometimes say that the 'toolbox' that people use against each other in custody and divorce cases is a very-small one.  These self-taught practitioners of the 'dark arts' of psychological warfare use just the top tray in the toolbox -- a limited number of tactics, used over and over (and over.)  A few examples: (Bad) Ask the children where they want to live, or with whom they'd like to spend time, (Bad) Have the children communicate or negotiate scheduling changes with the other parent, (Bad) Ask the children what they and other the parent are doing during parenting time,  (Bad) "Listen" to the children talk about their time with the other parent, or (Bad) Schedule activities onto the other parent&
Read more