The Improper Use of 'The Wedge' in Custody, Visitation and Divorce Cases
One tactic improperly used against my client is what I call "the wedge." It's when one parent gets the child excited about attending an activity or event that will infringe or cancel the other parent's parenting time, or that will require the other parent to provide transport to and from the activity or event. Once the child is excited about attending, without notifying the other parent or communicating directly adult-to-adult (which would be the proper way) the parent instead says, "It's OK with me, but you'll have to ask your Dad, since it's his weekend," or words to that effect. Now the child is like a torpedo, launched against the other, unsuspecting parent. The child's words will be something like, "Dad, can I be in baseball this summer? Mom says it's OK but I have to ask you." This puts the other parent (in this case, Dad) in an unwinnable situation: He may well enjoy the free-and-easy parenting time he has each we